captivity

[full_of_wrath]

Kirk gets called in. Mostly because Khan has made two duty officers guarding his cell ask to be relieved, one of them in tears.

He creates a lot of wear and tear, in general.

Comments

[full_of_wrath]

"I will. But I like the idea of the absolution of you deciding I've suffered enough. Telling me I've done my penance."

Is his tender explanation.

"What I remember most about the last time you hit me was you saying I didn't have to do it again."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

And Kirk realizes then that part of this has to be the cultural divide between them, but he doesn't know how to tailor it to what life is like now.

"It doesn't work like that. If I started doing this, whatever it is, with you, it wouldn't be because at the end of it you'd be absolved."

[full_of_wrath]

"I don't mean it'd have bearing on the real world."

He admits, shaking his head.

"But you could take a hot poker to me, I wouldn't bat an eyelash. Or what you were doing to me, last time. It hurt. But I couldn't afford to break. Your stopping, earlier, this time, before I would be forced to make a sound, and telling me I had done enough, I'd enjoy that."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

Kirk lets out a slow breath, because he's being very swayed by this line of thought. He can see, because he's also a tactician, how it could be maneuvered to his advantage. Khan could be made to feel less guilt, and perhaps his loyalty could be earned through feeling redemption the way he was taught to view it.

"Does this mean you feel guilt for what you did to Pike? To the others?"

[full_of_wrath]

"I don't feel anything, when I think about most of that year."

He admits, drawing a knee to his chest.

"It reminds me more of old Earth. I stood most of two days, once, tied in strappado. Do it to me again, and let me down before I betray myself screaming, this time."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"Is that how this would help you?"

And he asks it earnestly in a tone that implies he wants to help Khan.

[full_of_wrath]

"Not if you're doing it strictly as a service. But if there were something you would appreciate in it-"

Explaining, with a hopeful glance.

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"There is. You were the one to point out my sadistic side."

He reminds him, but that's not what he'd really get out of this. He finds deep meaning in service; it's part of what makes him the captain he is.

[full_of_wrath]

"I wish I felt something about Pike."

He admits, absently.

"But I feel cauterized, when I think of any of it."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"No. I get it. I feel the same way, when I think of..."

The Romulans, the other people he's had to take down.

"Never mind."

[full_of_wrath]

"It was a long year."

Explaining, rubbing his eyes.

"It's been a very long time since I did rest at all."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"I get it."

He says again, his tone putting distance between him and the subject.

"You really wouldn't mind being tied up?"

[full_of_wrath]

"I want to do it."

He'll mind. But he wants it, all the same.

[kobayashiwhatnow]

Kirk is understandably skeptical.

"Then, for starters, I could chain your ankle to a chair while you work?"

He knows full well Khan could break the chair and get away. He's sure Khan knows it too. That's not the point.

[full_of_wrath]

He lets out a breath, and nods. Yes.

"And read about strappado. That's your first homework."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"I know what it is."

He says, very quietly.

"I'm not going to do that to you."

[full_of_wrath]

"Leave my feet on the ground."

He answers.

"I told you, I've withstood it for more than a day at a time."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"Feet on the ground."

He echoes firmly.

[full_of_wrath]

"It simply forces you to stand bent."

Explaining.

"It aches, more than anything."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"If something goes wrong, Bones is going to look at you."

That's not negotiable. But as he says it he realizes he's agreeing to do it.

[full_of_wrath]

Khan realizes it too, and sits up in his seat, eagerly.

"Of course."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"You get something to eat, you rest tonight. We'll do it after your shift tomorrow if I feel up to it. If not, we'll put it off until I feel like we can do it."

He has a smoothly commanding voice when he's made up his mind about something. There's steel in it.

[full_of_wrath]

It's been a long time since he could risk relaxing into the will of another, without the weight of his responsibilities on his shoulders.

"Of course, sir."

[kobayashiwhatnow]

"Good. Repeat that back to me, what I expect you to do before we do this tomorrow."

It's such a natural flip that he doesn't even think about it.

[full_of_wrath]

"Eat, rest, black boots, come to you."

Reciting, quietly.

"If I'm well, you'll tie me."